Parent Articles in Three Acts

Act I

How do you engage your parents at your school? Most of can answer this in many ways--parent conferences, back-to-school nights, college/career nights, topical programming, and coffees or teas, just to name a few.  However, take a second and think about how you engage the parents of minority students or under-served populations at your school?  If you think that by doing all of the ideas listed above you are keeping them engaged, you might want to think again.  In the May issue of Counseling Today, a publication of the American Counseling Association, Dana Griffin of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill wrote an article about the need to advocate and engage African-American parents in the schools.  Dr. Griffin felt that there is a perception "that African-American are uninvolved in their children's education." (source: ct.counseling.org) She looked into research on the topic and found that African-American parents are most assuredly involved in their children's education, but that often it centers around the home and community centers, and not in the schools.  Why is this?  She took a focus group of 16 African-American parents and found that:

• They often did not feel welcomed into the school and felt that the schools do not have their best interests at heart.  Further, they felt that parents from other cultural groups received more in depth information and communication from teachers about their children than they themselves did.
• They felt that the school did not want their input or want them to take on leadership within the schools.  When they asked how mothers from other cultural groups had been given the responsibility of leading an activity or planning a trip, they stated the response was that the teachers had asked them personally to spearhead activities. (source: ct.counseling.org)

Enter the school counselor.  In addition to the teachers, we are often one of the main points of contact for parents within our buildings, elementary through high-school.  Dr. Griffin recommends several ways to make sure you are engaging parents from all of your under-served populations:

• Help to facilitate feedback from parents of all cultural groups about how they perceive the school and community.  Do a needs assessment and utilize surveys after events.  See if parents are interested in forming sub-groups--Latino parents, African-American parents, parents of LGBT students.  You could then have representatives from these groups on your Advisory Council to help better inform the needs and perspectives of your entire school community.
• Work with parent liaisons and other parent leaders within the diverse cultural and minority groups within your school.  I do not know how I would be able to effectively do my job without our parent liaison who is also a strong link to our Hispanic community.  She helps me to both communicate with families as well as advocate for them and their children.  Further, it is often your parent leaders from all of the various groups in your school that can go into their communities and help to bring other parents into your senior night or back-to-school event.
• Go to the parents.  Are there community venues that you can visit that would help to connect you to families?  Maybe you can offer to do a college/career presentation at a local community center?  Further, when you have events at school, make sure that you are actively going out and talking to parents and not just waiting for them to come to you at a table.  Oftentimes I walk around at our various parent events and simply ask families if I can answer any questions for them or assist in any way--you are able to start some meaningful conversations this way.
• Just as we teach students to become self-advocates, we can help parents to become more familiar with ways that they can productively work with schools to be heard and become more involved.  I find that if you, as a school counselor, have worked to establish a good relationship and built trust with a parent, they will call you or stop in when they need something.  You can then help them to work out what the plan of action can be with them at the lead. (source: ct.counseling.org)

If we, as school counselors, believe that support and engagement of parents is a foundation for academic success, than it behooves us to examine how we and our schools connect with all of our parents and make changes accordingly.

Act II

In the same May issue of Counseling Today, John Sommers-Flanagan of the University of Montana wrote about seven tips for working effectively with parents:

• Be self-aware.  As with all things in counseling, it is important to know your own natural reactions to things.  Dr. Sommers-Flannagan gives the example of a parent who is spanking their child.  If you yourself had negative experiences of being spanked growing up, your immediate reaction may be one of defensiveness and possibly anger.  It is important to know your biases so that you are then more able to listen and respond effectively.
• Know what's hot in parenting.  Do you know about a Tiger mom is?  If so, it might lend you credibility with parents if they ask you what you think or refer to it.  It is important to keep abreast of larger trends in parenting--chances are that if it's on the morning shows and in newspapers, your parents are talking about it and have questions.
• Empathy should come before education.  We have to remember the same things with our students, which can be a challenge sometimes when you only have five minutes!  However, one of the universal truths I hold in this profession is that most of the time people simply want someone to listen to them and acknowledge that they have been heard.  If you allow this to happen first, most people are very receptive to any education or thoughts you may have to assist.
• Be direct and collaborative.  Honesty is very important--if they want to know about your background working with kids, let them know.  If they want to know if you have kids, its okay to be honest.  However, what separates us as counselors from other professionals is that our training tells us to examine why they want to know that particular information and acknowledge the thoughts or feeling that may be behind it.  If they are asking the questions above, they may be worried about your inexperience.  Acknowledge that you understand their concern but that you'll do your best and that together, you can all come up with some ideas.
• Parents usually know their kids best.  When something happens at school and you call the parent for more information, more times than not they have pretty spot-on ideas about where motivations or issues may be coming from.  I find that parents are often pretty realistic about their kids, both their strengths and weaknesses.  As school counselors, they are a font of information about our students.  After all, they've lived with them over all these years. 
• Come from a strengths based model, especially with the parents.  I've written about this before, but I think it is awfully challenging to be a parent nowadays.  The media and society at large put a lot of pressure on parents to be perfect so that they can raise the perfect kids who will go to the perfect college and have the perfect life, and if anything goes wrong along the way it is the parents' fault.  Always acknowledge the wonderful things you think the parents are doing well and let them know all of the things they already have in place to help support their child.  This can lay a strong groundwork to come up with a plan to help their child.
• Give advice and then listen for their feedback.  If I propose a plan or a solution for a student, I always ask the parent what they think about it?  Do they think it will work?  Do they think its realistic?  Do they think it is something they can try?  If it's not, then we need to go back and come up with something else.  Just giving advice, without checking in and seeing what they think, and without collaborating, will usually not work very well. (source: ct.counseling.org)

This is a wonderful article--I recommend clicking on the link in the body of this section and reading it in full.

Act III

This article from NPR's Planet Money is something to share with your parents, ideally in an e-newsletter that you send out.  It is no secret that the economy is on the forefront of everyone's mind.  Research at the University of Arizona in Tuscon is finding that those families who talk to their children about money, savings, and involve them in such family financial matters as buying cars or houses are more likely to raise children who will be making responsible financial choices.  These kids, as they graduated from college, were often found to be using budgets and delineating between items that were "needs" versus "wants."  The researchers also recommend that families with young children discuss expectations about how much of their allowance and monetary gifts is expected to go into savings and follow through with that plan.  They acknowledge that these conversations can be tough to start, but can have positive life-long effects.  Click here for the full article.

Resource: High School Dropouts

1.3 million students drop out of school each year.  American business needs 97 million skilled workers to fill much needed jobs in the economy, yet only 45 million workers currently possess those skills (source: www.americangraduate.org).  I've written about the employment and skills quandary in a previous post.  If you look around the country, you find some places have really made strides and improvements in helping guide more students to graduation, and there are other places that still struggle a great deal.

American Graduate is an organization that has dedicated itself to investigating why students drop out of school--what are the risk factors and warning signs?  Further, they have also worked to identify solutions and strategies that schools, educators, and families can use to help prevent kids from leaving school without a diploma or a GED.  American Graduate has partnered with local organizations in states and cities across the U.S. as a means of gathering information about the issue locally as well as getting the word out about the problem and ways to find solutions.  For example, here in the Washington D.C. metro area, they partnered with a local NPR radio station, WAMU, to produce a nine-part radio series that looked at the high-school dropout crisis in this area.  Kavitha Cardoza, a reporter at the station, examines the issues from a local point of view, but the strength of this series is that I believe it is applicable anywhere.  It identifies the main risk factors for dropping out, the long term effects of students leaving school without a diploma or certificate, and what some communities have done to try to either prevent dropping out or to give students a second chance:

• Breaking the Cycle When Dropping Out Runs in the Family:  This episode examines how dropping out can be seen from generation-to-generation (remember your Bowen theory and genograms), and the impact this has on families over time.  Further, it discusses risk factors such as pregnancy and students with learning disabilities.  One part that I found interesting was how connected one of the subjects felt to a former teacher, and how that connection made such a difference in her ability to learn during that particular school year.
• How Many Students Really Graduate from High School?:  As most of us have known for a while, graduation rate calculations have varied widely from state-to-state, with some involving sampling and self-reporting, some that include both diplomas and GED's, and some that only pull numbers from those in the 12th grade, leaving out any students that may have dropped out before then.  There is now a new method for all states to use in calculating graduation rates, the adjusted graduation cohort rate, which will follow and track all students who enter the 9th grade.  Further, many states are using databases to determine which subgroups of students are most at-risk for dropping out.
• Why Kids Drop Out: Identifying the Early Warning Signs: There are three large warning signs that are discussed--attendance, behavior, and grades/academic performance.  When one of these is an issue for a student, it can be a risk factor, but when two or three are an issue, that student may be in real danger.  School policies that involve the parents/guardians, connecting abstract coursework to the real world, and having teachers that regularly encourage students are discussed as antidotes.
• Graduation Rates Increase Around the Globe as U.S. Plateaus:  In 2009, the U.S. ranked 21 out of 26 countries with regards to their graduation rate.  In the past, the U.S. used to rank first.  Some believe that we have fallen because of a stronger emphasis on the social nature of schools--the clubs, the sports, and prom.  Others believe that we have not become weaker, but that other countries have worked hard to improve their graduation rates, and offer multiple paths to a diploma, such as through vocational education, something that U.S. education has shied away from because of the stigma associated with "tracking" students.  In developing countries, graduation rates are on the rise because education is seen as transformative--it can pull people out of poverty and change lives.
• Battling Homelessness, Crime on the Path to Graduation:  Two stories are presented.  In one, a student who has been homeless most of his life discusses his struggles and how he has overcome them and remained focused on school.  In the other, an older student who was in jail for three years for a felony conviction regains academic focus at an alternative school following his release.
• In Experimental School, Tight-Knit Community Helps Students Succeed:  At the Baltimore Talent Development High School, students graduate at a 78% rate within five years, which is higher than the school district's average and much higher than neighboring schools.  This is done by focusing on attendance, behavior, and coursework.  Students have daily competitions between the grade levels for attendance, and the school environment is highly structured in order to minimize down time and distractions, everything from uniforms to class schedules built on the concept of "teaming," where students have classes with the same students and teachers all day long.  The idea is that if students are not motivated themselves to succeed, the staff and their peers can help to keep them moving forward.
• Scaling Up Solutions to the Dropout Problem:  This installment tackles the question, "can you identify and then transfer successful components from one program into others?"  Diplomas Now has done this, showing early success in a school and then expanding into other programs.  Key components of their program involve smaller groups of students, careful monitoring, developing relationships with kids, and a high staff-to-student ratio.  The strong academic program is the first line of defense.  Next, the program involves City Year volunteers who help to keep track of students attendance, behavior, and grades and then, through staffing meetings, design interventions if the child needs support.  Finally, for those students with needs that exceed what can be provided within the walls of the school, there is a social worker who helps to connect them to outside resources.
• Bridging the Gap Between Home and School: Attendance officers as well as school and community social services reach out to connect parents to what is going on in their children's lives.  Unexcused absences are not the only issue; excused absences are also a reason for concern.  Students will sometimes be excused in order to take care of siblings or to take parents grocery shopping or to the doctor.  By meeting with parents face-to-face and building relationships with them early, the schools try to lessen the "value-disconnect" and help bring families on board with the importance of education.
• The Impact of the High School Dropout Crisis: Alternative schools and second-chance programs allow dropouts to give high-school another try.  Students can find success at programs that have on-the-job training and that tie education to real-world experience.  Students may attend programs that end in a GED, or some will go through schools that offer mentoring, accelerated credit recovery programs, and more convenient hours.  These programs are important, as those who never get a high-school diploma have less earnings and spending potential, are less likely to vote, less likely to volunteer, are at a higher risk for ending up in the justice system, and are more likely to have health issues.  More important, however, is the loss of human potential.

How can you, as a school counselor, take the ideas and concepts discussed in this series and apply them to your individual situation?

• Use data to identify those students who may be at risk, as early as possible.  If I think about my work with my own students, the ABC acronym (attendance, behavior, course performance) is exactly what I use to help me determine who needs additional supports and interventions in order to keep them in school.  Students who consistently miss school, either for excused or unexcused absences, are not getting the instruction they need nor are they engaging in the school community.  Students who are constantly having behavior issues, getting suspended or thrown out of class, are also not getting the instruction they need.  Students who are not performing well academically are not amassing the skills and credits they need for graduation, falling further and further behind, becoming frustrated and more disengaged from education.  If you have a student who is struggling with all three, no matter if they are in elementary school or a junior in high-school, they are at an extremely high-risk for dropping out of school at some point.  
• Use your counseling skills to help figure out what is behind those risk factors.  Students may be missing school, but is it because they hate school and are disengaged from the process, or is it because they are expected to help take care of siblings, parents, or other family members?  Students may be acting out in class, but is it because they are responding to bullying and harassment because of their LGBT status or is it because they are trying to take attention away from the fact that they do not understand basic math, making Algebra 1 impossible?  Their grades may be low, but is that because they are bored in class, ace every test, and do absolutely no homework, or is it because there may be an unidentified learning disability or other impediment?  As school counselors, we are specifically trained to ask the questions that will help us to get the information we need to truly begin to assist the student.
• It takes a village.  Once you have identified a student or a group of students who are struggling with one or all three of the ABC's and gotten some ideas as to what may be the background behind their struggles, gather the troops together.  The more people who are involved in assisting the student or students, the better.  Ask the parents to come in and meet with you, all the teachers, the administrator, the student, and any other personnel or community members that might be relevant or helpful.  For each individual student, if you are able to develop a plan with everyone present, you are much more likely to have consistency.  Further, it send a pretty clear message to the student that everyone at that table cares and wants the student to do well.  For groups, get other staff and community members to assist you in running a group for those who struggle with attendance, setting up an after-school or even during-school tutoring session, or partnering with someone in the community to work on anger-management and conflict-resolution skills.
• Know your resources.  Something that is pretty clear in the radio series is that many school systems have developed alternative programs to help students graduate.  In my own school district, there are multiple programs to help students graduate, from standards-based online coursework to programs that are part vocational, part academic.  We have GED prep-programs that incorporate GED prep, job skills, and career readiness.  Some area school systems have created schools-within-schools to help address at-risk problems like attendance and low grades, developing programs which are small and compact in nature so that students move together with the same students and teachers.  In addition to seeing what options might be available in your school system, gather additional community supports--is there low-cost or free family counseling?  Is there an after-school community resource center for kids?  Do you have a contact or two in social-services to assist with other family needs like housing, medical concerns, or child-care?  Again, you cannot possibly do it all, but if you have a bank of resources in your head (or on your computer), you can more easily help to solve some of the problems that are preventing the student from being successful.
• Build relationships.  This was pretty clear in the series, time and time again.  Students need someone within their buildings to connect to.  You can be that person.  More than this, though, you can help to facilitate relationship building between the student and their teachers, the teachers and the parent, the parent and the school.  The more people in this situation that feel comfortable talking to each other and problem solving, the better that will be for the student and the possible outcome.
• Follow-up.  Keep tabs on the student, meeting with them regularly.  Check in with the parent, especially around grade time or any time an attendance or discipline issue comes to light.  Check in with the teachers to see how things are progressing and if they need any assistance from you.  This way you are able to head possible problems off at the pass plus you are continuing to foster and nurture your relationships with the community of support you have helped to build around this student.

The American Graduate website has additional resources, including report cards by state on the dropout situation to include statistics on indicators, dropouts, dropout factories (schools with fewer than 60% of students graduating),  and the economic implications of students dropping out.  Further, it has reports on the student, teacher/principal, and parent perspectives on what causes students to dropout as well as what solutions each group offers.  My one concern that I've discussed before is that school counselors are left out of the discussion in American Graduate.  The parents, teacher, principals, and students surveyed offer solutions such as stronger relationships between the schools and families, between the students and their teachers, more access to support staff (implying school counselors, perhaps?), more collaboration between all the parties involved, and stronger early-warning systems (source: www.americangraduate.org).  It seems to me that the person in the building most able to have a global perspective on a student (academic, personal/family, career aspirations) is the school counselor.  It seems to me the person in the building most able to examine data to identify early warning signs is the school counselor.  It seems to me that the person in the building most able to facilitate the collaboration and relationship building between the teachers, student, family, school personnel, and district/community resources is the school counselor.  We can have a strong impact on the dropout rate in this country if we are able to identify students early, determine what is behind the risk factors, and then develop and follow through with a collaborative plan to see that student through to graduation.

In Support of Parents

If you work in a school, you probably hear, on a regular basis, comments about parents:

Where were the parents when she got into trouble after school?
I wish these parents would back off--they are smothering him.
It's because there's no father in the house...
It's because there's no mother in the house...
There must be something wrong at home.
The apple must not fall far from the tree.
That parent is crazy.  CRAZY.

Quite frankly, you have probably said or thought these things yourself about parents in your school or in your community from time to time.  And maybe even thirty seconds ago.

As a society, we love the blame game.  In education, when we are frustrated with a student and their behavior, academic performance, or general attitude and character, the thought usually crosses our minds that the parents might be at fault.  Sometimes the kid, but often the parents.  I have been no less guilty of this than anyone else.  However, as school counselors, it behooves us to look at situations from all angles.  So often in our work, we are trying to understand where the parents are coming from, where the teachers are coming from, and where the student is coming from, and then trying to come up with workable solutions for all the parties involved.  In order to do that, let's try to put ourselves in the place of parents.  What are they dealing with on a daily basis?

An article ran in this Sunday's Washington Post that explored the messages and motivations present in modern American parenting.  The author discusses how many parenting books are out there, all with different advice and different perspectives that often conflict.  What's a parent to think when bombarded one month with the in-your-child's-business "Tiger Mom" movement and then the laid-back hands-off French "Bringing Up Bebe" the next?  The article also brings up the messages parents are getting about college and future success:

“The underlying American assumption is, if our kids get into a great college, they’ll get a great job, then they’ll be happy.  Our cortex of fear is around achievement. So, in order for our kids to get into a great college, get a great job and be happy, we get them piano lessons, after school Mandarin class, we think more, more, more, more, more is better." (source: http://www.washingtonpost.com/)

The last several years we have lived in a challenging economy, and parents are constantly being hit with the messages that if their child doesn't go to college, they will not have a good job and thus a good life.  They are then being told that it is becoming more and more difficult to get into college as average GPA's and standardized test scores for admissions continues to rise.  Further, they see that college tuition costs continue to soar, causing anxiety about being able to finance their child's post-secondary education.  Contrasting this is the Race to Nowhere movement that includes a movie and touring discussion panels talking about the negative side of pushing your kids to get straight-A's and enrolling them in a million activities.

So, should parents be backing off of their kids so that they don't have a nervous breakdown?  If they don't push them, though, then they won't get into a good college or any college at all and then they won't get a good job and they will have a horrible life.  Which one do they pick?  These double-bind messages bombard parents from the media, from instutitions, from politicians, and from other well-intentioned parents before their children are ever born and continue, pretty much unceasingly, through the rest of their lives.

I work in a school where many of the faculty and staff are parents.  In my conversations with them, I often hear about their fear of being judged by other parents, and their fear of making a wrong choice for their kids.  It surprises me, because so many of my colleagues are amazing, nurturing, kind people who I just naturally assume know they are amazing parents.  Yet, they tell me, they are being judged all the time for every little thing that they do--judged by other parents, by the schools, by society, and by themselves.

Everyone will pretty much admit that no one is perfect.  Yet, in the next breath, we presume to pass judgement on the parenting choices of moms and dads, usually without all the facts, usually without the context of a situation, and usually without any empathetic understanding that parenting is perhaps the hardest role in the world, made harder still by a million mixed messages about how best to raise your children  in modern American society.  Over the years, I have come to the conclusion that most parents are genuinely doing the best they can with the resources they have.  They love their kids, and they want the best for them.  This will manifest itself in a plethora of ways, but this is almost always their motivation behind everything that they do.

The article from this Sunday's Post is worth a read.  The message I took away from it is that parents need to cut themselves some slack.  I agree with this.  Even if a parent is angry with us, there is usually some motivation behind that anger--anxiety, fear, frustration.  As counselors, we have been trained to find ways to uncover that motivation and then empathize with the parent.  When we are able to do this, we form stronger relationships with the families of our students and are better able to serve all of our stakeholders--parents, teachers, and students alike.

Resources: 7 College Blogs/Websites You Should Know About

In my role as a high-school counselor, I am often asked about issues pertaining to college and college admissions:

When to apply to colleges? 
How to select schools to apply too? 
What the criteria are to get into college?  Do I have those criteria?
How will I pay for college? 
When should I take the SAT or ACT?
How important is the essay?
How do I set up a tour?  What should I ask on the tour?
How many AP classes should I take to get into college?

One of the challenges of school-counseling is that you are expected to be an expert...in everything. 

Depression and mental health issues?  Expert.  Study skills and test taking strategies?  Expert.  Alternative schools and placements?  Expert.  Parenting?  Expert.  Post-secondary planning to include college, apprenticeships, jobs, community colleges, four-year universities, trade and professional schools?  Expert.  Social skills?  Expert.

There is no possible way that we can be all-knowing omniscient beings, able to tackle every problem with a single keystroke or wave of a magic wand.  Thus, we need to have resources either to educate ourselves or to share with our school-communities.  The following is a list of college-blogs that I both follow and share with my students and their parents via regular electronic newsletters that I mail out through Naviance, a post-secondary planning platform that my school system utilizes.

ACT Student Blog

The thing I love most about this blog is that is is written by actual students going through the college admissions process.  The writers are current high-school juniors, seniors, and even post-grads writing from the vantage point of having already applied, been accepted, and now attending college.  I find that students are often more likely to take information in from their peers than from adults--in this respect, this blog definitely fits the bill.  The students cover topics ranging from test-prep to choosing the right classes to time-management.

NY Times--The Choice Blog--The Envelope Please

The Times runs a wonderful blog, The Choice Blog, which covers the world of higher education to include college admissions and financial aid--you should definitely be following it as a high-school counselor.  However, a subset of this blog is, like the ACT Student Blog, written by current students as they go through the college search process.  They are wonderfully honest essays about the ups and downs of this process--currently the students are all in the midst of the post-application-anxiety-sit-and-wait-phase and also combating heavy cases of senioritis. 

Washington Post--College, INC Blog

I may be biased as I live in the Washington D.C. metropolitan area, but this is a highly informative and timely blog that follows the trends, trials, and tribulations of the entire college and post-secondary process.  It does not have student writers like the previous two, but it provides strong analysis of changes from year to year as well as insight into where the process stands in any given moment.  A guest post from an author with an upcoming book about the college admissions world wrote the following:

"Q: What is the ACT?"

"A: Another standardized test, which up until twenty minutes ago was popular only in the Midwest. But because there are no trick questions, they allow score cancelling and unpenalized guessing, and offer an early September test date, it is the test du jour . New Yorkers are now obsessed with the ACT, and it is gaining fans in other trendy cities. In fact, for the first time ever, the number of ACT test takers is about the same as the SAT. Poor SAT — it now stands for Sad Anachronistic Test." (source: www.washingtonpost.com)

The College Solution

This is another blog that does not feature student writers, but contains a lot of great information that is written by a woman who is both in the know as a journalist and higher-education expert as well as a mother who has been through this process twice.  You might find that she resonates well with your parent population.  However, her posts are also wonderful for students--her latest series featured three posts about getting ideas for a college-list, finding "hidden gems" for that list, and eight-ways to build the list.  I have found this information extremely helpful as we are currently working with our 11th grade students on beginning the process of searching for colleges that would be strong matches.

The next three websites are not really blogs, but are really top notch resources to share with your students and parents.

Acceptly

This website has many features, but the one I find the most useful is the "Advice" page.  Here you can find articles full of useful information and perspectives.  However, my favorite part are these short, minute-to-a-minute-thirty seconds videos that you can put in e-newsletters or show to students as part of presentations.  Take a look at this one that covers the differences between the SAT and the ACT.

KnowHow2Go

This is another website that helps students and families plan ahead for the admissions process.  The aspect that I really like is that it has separate lists for the tasks that freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors should do in order to make themselves strong applicants for colleges as well as find a school that will work best for them.  The graphic nature of the website also makes it high-school student friendly. 

College Data

This website has multiple features.  First, like Naviance it has a full range of college match, college search, and scatagram features--if you are in a school that does not have the Naviance software which will compare students' GPA's and test-scores to the averages of the college or university that the student is considering, this website might be your next best choice.  However, beyond this it has first-person accounts from students of their experience through the process.  They are not really blog entries, but, as previously mentioned, these stories might resonate with your students since they are written by peers.  

These websites will never replace the one-on-one interactions you will have with your students, but as more and more people want information "in the moment," they can certainly help to provide multiple perspectives on a single topic as well as fuel more informed conversations when you discuss post-secondary planning. 

Homophobic Language

Another parent posted an entry to Huffington Post about her thoughts concerning homophobic language and slurs and the possible harmful effects it can have on children.  Even in our schools, you can, from time-to-time, hear comments such as "that's so gay" or slurs such as "fag" or "dyke" come out of the mouths of not only other students but also from adults in the schools as well as parents at home.  What effect does that language have on all of our students?  It can certainly cause more angst, self-loathing, and fear amongst those LGBT students, but it also reinforces the acceptability of such language for everyone else.

Read this parent's take on it here.

A Mother's Take on Homophobia and Kids

This came to my attention from several different fronts.  A blogger and mother wrote a post about the crush that her young son has on Blaine, a character on the television show, Glee!.  Read the original post here. 

She received a lot of feedback and posted a response to the Huffington Post that discusses the comments people wrote to her original post as well as her perspective on homophobic language and its effect on kids, including elementary school-aged children. Worth a read--click here for the post in its entirety.